Why Oh Why Did I Ever Get Married

If marriage isn't all that it is cracked up to be, why shouldn't I just stay single?  I think this is a valid question  many couples are asking since there has been a dramatic increase in cohabitation over marriage. After seeing a full generation of adults fracture their families through selfishness and divorce, many are saying there is no real benefit to marriage.  Myself, I have now written a number of posts on the difficulty of marriage.  We face real challenges merging two lives into one. The struggle of overcoming power and control issues as well as the selfishness and self-centeredness we always bring into a marriage are the top areas of concern.

So, what is the benefit of marriage?

From a social and physical standpoint, marriage wields huge benefits.  Studies reveal married couples are healthier, have better paying jobs, have better sex lives, and live years longer than their single counterparts.   Overall, they self assess as happier, healthier and more at peace.  However, it is the spiritual benefits of marriage that strengthen the case.  Marriage is the incubator for spiritual maturity.  There is no better place for the fruit of the spirit to be produced than in marriage.  There is no place where it is more difficult to overcome impatience, self-centeredness, bitterness, and harshness.  Two people living and loving together rub against each other like stones in a rock polisher.  With each interaction a fragment of self-centeredness is polished away, a sliver of impatience falls to the wayside, and bitterness turns to thanksgiving.  While there are those who are called to singleness, God most often uses marriage as one of his best tools in our ongoing sanctification.  Our marriage of today prepares us for our marriage in eternity.

I can't imagine being single because I love marriage.  Yes, it is challenging at times, and there are times when my self-centeredness, impatience and harshness would otherwise go unnoticed if not for Patty.   But...  I can't imagine facing this life without her.  Combine this relationship with the relationship each of us has with Jesus, and you have a cord of three strands, which is not easily broken.

Thought for the Week:  Am I allowing God to improve our marriage?   Am I allowing God to improve me through my marriage?

Prayer for the Week:  Lord, help me see my marriage as you see my marriage.  Work through me to make it a place of harmony, trust, respect, and sacrificial love.

Ecclesiastes 4: 12 - And if one prevails against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not easily broken.